“Life never turned out as I expected” can be heard from the lives of disappointed, troubled people.
With all the ‘curve ball’ and ‘hailstorm’ events of everyday living, life demands adaptability. The trite expression, “If life hands you a lemon, make lemonade,” applies to making the best out of the worse. It does not imply that one deny reality; it encourages one to move forward in the midst of harsh scenarios.
The last stage in the Elizabeth Kubler-Ross grief assessment speaks of acceptance. Grief entails a number of stages. However if one chooses not to accept loss, that person remains stuck in grief. Some enduring grief never embrace the acceptance mode. Perhaps self-pity, self-centeredness, attention-seeking or a combination of the three prevent acceptance.
Regardless of the reasons for it, getting stuck in grief also alienates the griever from his/her loved ones. The relentless ‘yes, but’ responses to an encourager’s admonitions of hope hinders healthy discussions and relationships. The griever can choose to overcome maladies with life adapting skills that combat even the most unpleasant of circumstances.
If a ‘new normal’ outlook cannot arise from the ashes of tragedy, that person chooses hopelessness and depression. There can be no moving forward without accepting the circumstances that one can never change. It demands reaching for a better life outlook. Cultivating a hope-filled life plan first comes with the decision to move positively forward.
Adaptability, a vital key to handling hardship, opens the prison doors of complacency to a new world of possibilities with hope abounding. It takes both courage and faith to make the transition, but what a better way to live!